Father's 80th Birthday Party?

David

My wife's parents are cuban. They have 3 children; two daughters and 1 son. The son was born in the United States. The three children got together (one of which is my wife) to give their father a "80th-birthday party." Their mother was given the job of making, and mailing, the birthday invitations.

When we got OUR copy of the invitation, it stated that their "son and his wife" were throwing a birthday party for his dad. There was NO mention of the two daughters being any part of this party.

My wife, and her sister, of course - WERE FURIOUS! Their mother reminded them that "the son comes first" in a Cuban family. My wife asked "what about HIS wife?" Well, she is cuban (she was also born in the USA). So That Makes It "All Right..."

I am not Cuban, nor is my brother in law. So we are invisible to the eyes of her parents. AND our kids, too. Not cuban... The brother-in-law's daughter was born in the USA too. But SHE is their ONLY grandchild, and Cuban, too...

What do you think of this?

Answer
Think of it? It stinks. Ignoring the contributions of anybody, especially someone you're supposed to love, stinks. Of course, that gets you nowhere, because...

...you can't change the way someone else thinks. It's been explained to Mom that she hurt your wife, and your sister-in-law, and left out his wife, and you, and... And Mom didn't get it. Doesn't want to get it.

So what to do? Go to the party and have a good time. If anyone mentions how great everything is, say, "Yes, my wife and her sister put in a lot of work on this." Show that you are proud of your wife and her sister, no matter who else elects to ignore them.

Let's put it this way - my husband's family is very clannish. When his grandparent's 50th anniversary rolled around, it was just before our wedding. His aunt elected to omit me from the huge family portrait, because I wasn't family. To some of them, I'm not family even now, just part of the "ladies' auxiliary." Why let it chap me? My husband loves me, and thinks I'm very important, and respects me.

Show your wife how proud you are of her (and it wouldn't hurt to throw a bone to your sister-in-law) - a better use of your time than futilely trying to drag the cavepeople out of the stone age. Good luck!

80th Birthday Party Ettiquette-Invitations to Those Who Cannot or Will Not Attend?

Sarah

My grandmother is turning 80 in a few months and I would like to have a special celebration for her. The problem is, most of the people she is close to live far away and don't have very much money. I know many of them will not be able to attend. Her favorite relatives who live closer also will not attend due to religious reasons.

I would like to invite all of her friends and family anyway. By doing so, I hope that possibly someone might feel inclined to jump on a plane. I would also like the invitation to serve as a reminder that this special event is about to happen. Is it acceptable for me to send invitations to people I have never met, but who I know can not attend? Also, it it acceptable for me to send invitations to relatives who do not celebrate birthdays because of religious beliefs?

My worst fear is that I will attempt to throw this fabulous party and nobody will be able to attend besides immediate family that she sees every day. I'm afraid it would depress her.

Answer
Send invitations to everyone that knows and loves your grandma and wants to celebrate her life. Put a small piece of paper in each and have each person write a memory they have of your grandmother. Also, you could ask for pictures anybody would be willing to donate. Have everyone send these items to your address (along with an RSVP) at least a week or two before the party so you can make a scrapbook for your grandma. This will be a nice way to let her know that even though some of her friends could not make it, they were still thinking of her.

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I am hosting an 80th birthday party for my Dad. On the invitations, how can I respectfully ask for no gifts?

Gringa

My Dad's motto has always been, If I need it, I will buy it, If I don't need it, I don't want it. Simply typing no gifts sounds a little harsh to me.

Answer
The generally accepted way to designate no gifts is just to write "Please, no gifts" in the bottom corner of the invitation.

If it's a less formal invitation, just write what you've told us: "Please, no gifts. As you all know, Dad's motto is, 'If I need it, I'll buy it. If I don't need it, I don't want it'."

I'm sure it will be a lovely birthday party, good luck to you and your father!

17th Birthday: Black Light Party Ideas??!?

PRINCESS

My best friend and I are having our 17th birthday party together this spring and it's going to be a black light party with strobe lights too.. it's going to be pretty big- with 80 kids from our junior class. We already have a location but we were wondering if you guys could come up with ANY good ideas to help us out like food, decorations, invitations, ect. Thanks!!

Answer
I'm holding a small 18th birthday party next month that will have black light. I was reading on websites that it's a good idea to make things glow. Like, put gummy worms/bears in a bowl and have a glowstick at the bottom. There some sort of technique called "glowstringing" but I don't know exactly what it is. I'm interested to see answers because I don't have a lot of ideas for my party either and it'll be in February or early march.

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Help with 80th Birthday invitation wording.?

sj2nj6069

I am trying to come up with an opening line to a birthday invitation for my 80 year old mother and came up with the first line below.

Does this sound too "obituary"? NOT the effect I want LOL She was married one time and divorced and her ex-husband is now dead so I didn't think putting "wife" in there would be good, it's a sore spot w/her. Thanks for any advice!!!

Daughter, Sister, Friend, Mother, Grandmother...

Please join Family & Friends in celebrating
(Honoree's name here) 80th birthday
Sunday, December 16
2-6 PM

(name of restaurant/address here)

RSVP needed by November 30 to:

(name and contact info here)

Dinner & Cocktails will be served

Answer
I believe it depends on the tone you wish to create. If your mother is of a more serious nature, the wording you include would be perfectly fine. However, if your mother is a more jovial, outgoing person, you might want to consider something a little more fun, like "Come join us for a party in honor of (Mom's name)'s 80th birthday while the rocking chair gathers a little more dust..."

An earlier answer pointed out an interesting point, saying they would wonder whether or not they would expect to pay. If you are planning on paying for all expenses, I believe it's worded appropriately and fairly clearly, however, if those attending will be expected to cover some expenses (such as drinks), that portion of the invitation might need to be reworded. And with serving alcohol, you might want to make it clear how much you plan on serving per person, as some people take advantage of those types of situations.

I need help planning an 80's birthday party?

rawr..

For my birthday in a couple weeks, I want to have a fun birthday party theme. Something related to neon, 80's, or anything colorful. Any ideas on what I could do? Ideas like games, decorations, invitations, etc.

Answer
Have a dance party with lots of 80s music in it.

Michael Jackson music ie Billie Jean, Beat It and Thriller
Funkytown by Lipps Inc (it's that song that plays in Shrek 2 as they arrive at Fiona's home city, you'll recognise it)
Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) by Eurythmics
Tainted Love by Soft Cell
Like a Virgin by Madonna
Video Killed the Radio Star by The Buggles
Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves
Living on a Prayer by Jon Bon Jovi
When Doves Cry by Prince
Sweet Child O Mine by Guns N Roses
You Shook Me All Night Long by ACDC
Don't Stop Believing by Journey (Glee did a cover very early on but the original was released by Journey in 1981)
Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
Girls Just Want to Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper
Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield
Just Like Heaven by The Cure
Under Pressure by Queen and David Bowie
In the Air Tonight by Phil Collins
Love Shack by the B-52s
Push It by Salt n Pepa (I always thought that was a 90s song but apparently not, 1986)
Bust a Move by Young MC
I love Rock and Roll by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts (trust me you'll know it when you hear it)
Call Me by Blondie
I want Candy by Bow wow wow
Down Under by Men at Work

You could also have people dress up in 80s themed costume and from what I know roller skating is big so you could do that too (but make sure you have safety gear - at least helmets you don't want to send one of your guests home with broken wrists and crap like that).

Invitations: 80s were big on bright colours and neons so have them bright and write in a few 80s slang into your invite (but make sure it's understandable for younger people as some may know next to nothing about the 80s). You can put pictures of typically 80s things like big 80s superstars like say Cyndi Lauper or picturs of 80s stuff like: Glo Worms, Super Mario Brothers, Cabbage Patch Kids, ET, Transformers (not the movies), Gremlins, Pacman, TMNT, Bill and Ted, Donkey Kong, Dirty Dancing, Inspector Gadget, Care Bears, Smurfs, Hungry Hippos, Back to the Future and the Rubik's Cube. Obviousy what you put on depends on how old you're turning, what/who you're into, exactly what your party is going to be like etc.

Decorations:
80s was a decade of bright, illuminant colour. Go for confetti, streamers, balloons in very bright colours like red, green, turquoise, hot pink etc. Neon and even metallic would be good and authentic but if you can't get something like metallic don't worry. Try to get some 80s stuff like what I listed above (second hand stores may have them and older family members might allow you to borrow some old stuff under the pretense it isn't damaged). Old records on the wall or lying around will also be authentic as records were still listened to in the 80s (walkmans were too but records were still big in the early part of the decade). Put posters of popular 80s music stars and big 80s movies like Dirty Dancing, Back the Future, Terminator etc on the walls. You could get these cheap from Ebay.

Ideas to Help With Costumes:
- Crop tops with mesh over lays
- Beaded jewellery and large crucifixes
- Ratty hair
- Bandanas
- Short SKirts
- Hole-y tights
- Cut off tshirts
- Shorts
- Lace up boots
- Jacket with lots of pins in it
- Tight black leather pants
- Eyeliner
- Lip gloss
- Leg warmers
- Feathered hair
- Scrunchies

If your guests aren't sure tell them to look at 80s pictures of people like Cyndi Lauper, Madonna, Prince, Michael Jackson, Adam Ant etc or just general 80s people photos or to ask their parents or if they have much older siblings that might work too.

Food:
Microwave popcorn
Twizzlers
String Cheese
Rice Cakes
Pop Rocks
Jelly Baby Jelly Beans (or just get normal ones if those are no longer sold in your area)
Coke
Pepsi
Mountain Dew
Pizza
Fruit Roll Ups
Nerds
Gummy Bears

Games
Twister
Dancing
80s Trivia Games

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How do you say "We love you" in Hawaiian?

birthday party invitations 80th image

sweetladym

My brother and sisters and myself are planning a Hawaiian-theme 80th birthday party for our mother, and I need this information for the party invitation. By the way, if I start my invitation with "Aloha," exactly what am I saying (is that correct...I just feel like that means hello, but I'm probably wrong)?

Answer
Aloha au ia'oe, or just Aloha!

Aloha means "we love you". Also means hello and goodbye.

What's a good catch phrase for a 30th "Sunglasses and mustaches" birthday party invitation?

Michelle

We were thinking about calling it a "Mustache bash" but we wanted to include sunglasses...and I need a fun way to write it out on the flyer...does anyone have any suggestions? It's for a 30 year old, so we could bring anything in about the 80's. thanks!

Answer
"Sunglasses & Mustaches FTW!"

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