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livingadre
IS it rude not invite the whole class? My friend says just invite a few kids but I would think that the kids who dont get an invitation are going to have their feeling hurt.
Answer
I think that if you don't invite the whole class, be discreet in passing out the invitations or mailing them to their home. If they don't get an invitation, they'll feel left out. If they hear about the party after the fact, it's not nearly as bad.
If you live in the country (or live in a house in town) and can have a camping party, that would be awesome. Set up some tents. Have a bonfire (we used a fire pit on the patio) and the kids roasted hot dogs and made smores. You would be suprised at how long they'll play outside in the dark even if they don't "camp" all night. I always make the kids come in because I don't want to sleep outside and I don't trust it (no one in particular, but things happen).
If the party is mainly inside, it's harder.
I'd have a couple of movies to watch; plenty of junk to eat.
Maybe carving some jackolanterns since we are in Halloween season; Have a horse shoe toss (plastic, of course). Rent a karoake machine and video everyone's performance and burn cd's for the kids to take home as favors;
You could hire an magician to come to your home and perform some "magic" tricks for the kids.
I think that if you don't invite the whole class, be discreet in passing out the invitations or mailing them to their home. If they don't get an invitation, they'll feel left out. If they hear about the party after the fact, it's not nearly as bad.
If you live in the country (or live in a house in town) and can have a camping party, that would be awesome. Set up some tents. Have a bonfire (we used a fire pit on the patio) and the kids roasted hot dogs and made smores. You would be suprised at how long they'll play outside in the dark even if they don't "camp" all night. I always make the kids come in because I don't want to sleep outside and I don't trust it (no one in particular, but things happen).
If the party is mainly inside, it's harder.
I'd have a couple of movies to watch; plenty of junk to eat.
Maybe carving some jackolanterns since we are in Halloween season; Have a horse shoe toss (plastic, of course). Rent a karoake machine and video everyone's performance and burn cd's for the kids to take home as favors;
You could hire an magician to come to your home and perform some "magic" tricks for the kids.
Parents: How do you feel about the "everybody gets a trophy" theory?
Pink, it's
When we were kids, if you won, you won. If you lost, you lost and had to try harder next time. Now they give every kid on the team a trophy! My son starts school tomorrow, and I was just reading through paperwork...the teacher asks that you do not hand out party invitations at school, unless you invite every single kid in the whole class! I think this is ridiculousness.
How do you feel about all this? Do you want your kid to get a trophy even if they don't really win...?
Answer
I think it's pathetic and ridiculous.
I had a wall full of trophies and ribbons as a kid and young adult. Academic, horse shows, cheerleading, crazy contests I entered, you name it. I wouldn't have enjoyed winning if I didn't *really* win or if everyone else won too. That's why it was fun when I won - I was the best and was reaping the benefit of my skill, hard work and dedication. That's why it was motivating to work harder if I didn't win. I don't apologise for it. If someone else didn't win, they didn't win. Try better next time; don't complain until someone decides to diminish the winner's victory and give you an equal prize for the sake of placation.
I don't want my kids being handed prizes simply for being a warm body.
I do not push them into sports or activities they don't want; if they're doing it, then they are the ones who made the decision, knowing they may or may not win and knowing that no one forced them into it. Therefore, they should reap the benefits and pitfalls without the padding of consolation equality.
I don't like the practise of giving equal prizes to everyone (except in really little kids' activities, where there isn't any real test of skill or work). It's like they're saying, "everyone is equal and gets the same recognition, even though some people did much better because they tried harder, worked longer, and put more time and effort into achievement." Giving everyone an equal prize just causes the potential high achievers to not care, since there's no real reward. My kids' wins and losses are their own - they should get exactly what they deserve in either case. If they win, they should get the top prize. If they don't, they should get whatever place they deserved and the knowledge that they gave it their best. Satisfaction and drive to do well comes from actual achievement - not a token gesture given to everyone to avoid the helicopter parents whining.
About birthday parties, I dunno. I don't much care, since my kids are homeschooled and only invite people they like.
I admit, I don't agree with handing them out in class, it's easier to mail them anyway, but I'm still not inviting everyone. It's their party - the purpose of a party is for a child to have a fun time with people whose company they enjoys.
Who wants the class bully or the nasty girl clique or the special kid who yells profanities hanging around on their birthday at their home?
No thanks. I'm not going to spoil my girl's birthdays just for the sake of looking politically correct by inviting the whole homeschool group, or the whole neighbourhood, or everyone from drama class, etc.
I think it's pathetic and ridiculous.
I had a wall full of trophies and ribbons as a kid and young adult. Academic, horse shows, cheerleading, crazy contests I entered, you name it. I wouldn't have enjoyed winning if I didn't *really* win or if everyone else won too. That's why it was fun when I won - I was the best and was reaping the benefit of my skill, hard work and dedication. That's why it was motivating to work harder if I didn't win. I don't apologise for it. If someone else didn't win, they didn't win. Try better next time; don't complain until someone decides to diminish the winner's victory and give you an equal prize for the sake of placation.
I don't want my kids being handed prizes simply for being a warm body.
I do not push them into sports or activities they don't want; if they're doing it, then they are the ones who made the decision, knowing they may or may not win and knowing that no one forced them into it. Therefore, they should reap the benefits and pitfalls without the padding of consolation equality.
I don't like the practise of giving equal prizes to everyone (except in really little kids' activities, where there isn't any real test of skill or work). It's like they're saying, "everyone is equal and gets the same recognition, even though some people did much better because they tried harder, worked longer, and put more time and effort into achievement." Giving everyone an equal prize just causes the potential high achievers to not care, since there's no real reward. My kids' wins and losses are their own - they should get exactly what they deserve in either case. If they win, they should get the top prize. If they don't, they should get whatever place they deserved and the knowledge that they gave it their best. Satisfaction and drive to do well comes from actual achievement - not a token gesture given to everyone to avoid the helicopter parents whining.
About birthday parties, I dunno. I don't much care, since my kids are homeschooled and only invite people they like.
I admit, I don't agree with handing them out in class, it's easier to mail them anyway, but I'm still not inviting everyone. It's their party - the purpose of a party is for a child to have a fun time with people whose company they enjoys.
Who wants the class bully or the nasty girl clique or the special kid who yells profanities hanging around on their birthday at their home?
No thanks. I'm not going to spoil my girl's birthdays just for the sake of looking politically correct by inviting the whole homeschool group, or the whole neighbourhood, or everyone from drama class, etc.
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Title Post: I am planning a birthday party for my nine year old boy - what games or activities should we do?
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